Little Woo Hoo Moments

A friend has a special event coming up and needed some clothes for it. So she came over yesterday and tried on my leather skirt and leather waist cincher. It still blows me away that I can look at her and think.... Wow, am I really almost her size?
See, that's a good thing. I consider her normal sized - not thin, but not fat.
I've never been normal sized. And I know I'm still not.
But here's the thing. The skirt almost, but not quite, zips up on me. It was just a bit loose on her. So we're not the same size, but we're close.
And that's hard for me to grasp.
After losing more than 100 pounds, I still have this tendency to see myself the way I was before. Is that because back then I didn't really see myself as I was? I think that's possible. The pre-weight loss surgery photos mortified me. I had no idea I looked that bad.
But now, I also have a had time conceptualizing myself.
I still look at others, or stand next to them, and think of myself as huge in comparison.
I still look at clothes on the rack or hanger and think, "There's no way that's going to fit on my fat ass."
Then they DO !
And yeah, I can say fat ass. No big deal. I think every woman has thought of themselves at some point as having a fat ass. I KNOW i had one, and still do.
I was obese since childhood.
But that is changing.
And that led to another "woo hoo" moment the other day.
I was attending a freelance writing seminar by SPJ, in one of those auditorium-style classrooms at UTA.
I though, "Uh oh, I'll never get this little desk over my lap."
When I was 17 and attending TCU, I could sit in those auditorium style seats, but that little desk would not sit flat over my belly. There just was too much belly in that seat.
So when I attendede the recent seminar, memories of college came flooding back, and I sat down with a bit of dread.
I needed the desktop to take notes. So I reached down, and pulled it up into place, hoping no one would notice when it didn't fit right.
But it did. It laid flat. And there was room to spare betwee it and me.
And I couldn't help but grin, because I knew that at 43 I was smaller than I was at 17, but this was the solid, hard proof of that.
Ok, so it's kind of embarrassing that I was that big at 17. But what an accomplishment now.
And today, I worked out with a trainer at the gym. He's going to put me on a program he swears will help me really kick off the weight loss that has now slowed down quite a bit.
I still have a long ways to go, even after losing 107 pounds.
That said, if anyone out there is curious about weight loss surgery, particularly the RNY (gastric bypass), feel free to ask me about it.
Between that, and getting regular exercise in, my life has changed dramatically.
And I'm happy to share the good, the bad and the ugly about it.